Unfettered

April 3

Unfettered

“The difference between a demand and a request is apparent to everyone.”  A drunk once said this and I hold it to my heart.  I can not be bullied or swindled into a corner; neither will I allow you to put a rope around my neck like a wayward calf.  I obey because it works for me and if you teach me that you are untrustworthy or careless I will obey you no longer, this doesn’t make me less obedient it just takes you out of the lead.  Sometimes I hold the reins and most times they are in the hands of G-d, but never shall my reins be in the hands of another, this is what I drank over and this is what I could drink over again.  No one person is my salvation and I cannot allow anyone to be my demise.  If you consume me like a drink, I will kill you as surely as any drug.

Hobble disrespect

*

STOP TALKING

Try to stop talking when people stop listening said my sponsor
And try not to take it personally
Why is that? I query

Most individuals can't handle much of anything real
Try as they may they are unable to listen
To anyone speaking the truth

Tell them a story and you can hold their attention all day
Sprinkle bits of honesty into the tale
And you still will keep your audience

But strafe them with bullets of the truth and they run for cover
I've seen it happen, I never knew what made them scurry
But I have seen them sprint away

It's a coping mechanism
If you try to turn their heart too quickly
They're afraid it will stop beating

Why is it you never worry about that with me?
You tell me the facts whether I want to hear them or not
I can tell you because you take step three

You are reading selections from More Sober on the Way to Sane and Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault

http://www.amazon.com/More-Sober-The-Way-Sane/dp/144141231X/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1374072329&sr=8-3&keywords=sober+on+the+way+to+sane

http://www.amazon.com/Lines-My-Life-Sherrie-Theriault/dp/1448652820/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1374072576&sr=1-1&keywords=Lines+from+my+life%2C+Sherrie+theriault

Penny Tor Your Thoughts

August 8

PENNY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS

There is a penny in the bathtub.  I wonder who stood in there with loose change.  Possibly confusing it for a wishing well, the penny was tossed in.  The stories I could tell the hopes that tantalize my mind, elves and leprechauns, dreamers and optimists all trundle through my thinking.  When I don’t know the answer, I can now at least look for the best, the sweetest thoughts.  I don’t run to the dark and threatening disasters.  I have lost the lease to my personal black cloud, the one that used to follow wherever I went.  I can smile now and think of pennies from heaven.  The first drop landed in my tub.

Think of what a spider and a whale have in common.

*

Stand- Hear

The spins and pirouettes I have preformed

in an attempt to avoid facing the music,

were impressive but futile and ultimately

delayed the beauty possible for me in this life.

When I stop my running and turn on my heel

there is a world of harmony waiting

to take me for a turn out on the dance floor.

Melody is not what I was expecting.

I was so sure I would be drummed out of my life,

not trumpeted in.

My surety set in motion much of my convoluted activity

and caused me great distress.

It is high time I listen with eyes open

and my reactions leashed;

Allowing the tune to introduce me to life

and lead me to my bliss.

Red Roses

June 14

RED ROSES

From tight green buds come beautiful red roses.  From small verdant places I blossom, too.  I open to richness unexpected and fullness unbelieved.  I look at laundry crumpled, never anticipating the look of clean sheets blowing on the line.  Doors I perceive as blocked by vast boulders are thrown open by willingness.  Who I am today is no one I recognize; I didn’t see myself coming.  I write though I can’t spell.  I love though my heart is broken.  I think though my mind is warped and I trust though the amulet is long shattered.  Promise is not a laid out plan but the continuum of change.  I can fight it or let it carry me where it goes.

Smile at similes.

*

What I Heard Through the Snow

The commentator’s voice fades in and out

as the reception is lost and found

among the static of my drive home.

In here is a pattern, a connect the dots matrix;

I try to feel my way too

as I weave past the slow and stubborn traffic.

Like a call from the wilderness

distorted through a storm, my frantic thoughts obscure,

sometimes distort the content, the intent,

the soul of a message I so desperately need.

Broadcast warnings, safety suggestions,

help and hope are torn to slivers

and rewoven in my careworn brain.

The distraction of the road allows the subliminal heart beat

to tattoo in my ear then my chest, all the way to my toes,

bodily acceptance overpowers my relentless mind

and clarity is achieved, no matter the drifts.

What and When, When and How.........and Why

March 5

What and When, When and How……and Why

Arriving at the place where I have nothing to prove, afforded me the luxury of not having to proclaim the amount of time I have, when I share in a meeting. Taking the score keeping out of the equation I was then able to think of what it was that motivated me to speak in a meeting. Self-Possession, a great gift to inhabit, a greater gift to demonstrate; quiet dignity is a real favorite of mine. If I am calm yet in control, if there is time, if there is a lull, I can share parts of my experience. If I have chaos, an agenda, a theory, a grudge it is all better left unsaid in the meeting and saved for the less vulnerable ear of my sponsor. For if I am wrong I might persuade in error and if I am right I might convert in righteousness.

Why is it that what I never say rings louder than anything I do?

Leave gossip where you find it

*

MOTE

I dug the mote, the alligators came on their own.
The rain fell, I did not bid it.
I've burned all the bridges
I've sold the farm.

I wonder at the company I keep
The birds fly in and stay for a season
Friends used to wave as they passed
Now my island is overgrown.

I stand to my chin in the tall grass
I guess it's a matter of maintenance
What I don't keep pruned grows back
The connections I don't secure weaken and fail.

I am subject to all that falls, if I don't keep my roof on.
The wind chaps me without the walls of my home
No clothes and I burn
No joy and all I do is cry.

It takes more than a continuous ditch
To protect my heart.
More than water and reptiles
To safeguard my soul.

Stand Hear

August 8

Stand Hear

The spins and pirouettes I have preformed in an attempt to avoid facing the music, were impressive but futile and ultimately delayed the beauty possible for me in this life. When I stop my running and turn on my heel there is a world of harmony waiting to take me for a turn out on the dance floor. Melody is not what I was expecting. I was so sure I would be drummed out of my life, not trumpeted in. My surety set in motion much of my convoluted activity and caused me great distress. It is high time I listen with eyes open and my reactions leashed; allowing the tune to introduce me to life and lead me to my bliss.

Let bad habits run away from home; pack their bags when you can

*

DON’T BE

Don’t be stupid.

Don’t be crazy.

Don’t be anything out of the ordinary.

Don’t be angry.

Don’t be hateful.

Just don’t be that way.

Don’t be sad.

Don’t be mopy

Smile fore the camera and pretend for everyone.

I often wondered why I felt like dyeing

And it took me years to understand why,

Don’t be, equals = Death.

Don’t feel.

Don’t cry.

Don’t love

.

Life is about action, presence and content.

You’re wrong if you break the rules

And dead if you keep them.

So please don’t be Them.

Look back when you have to

But step out of the grave.