Spontaneous Willingness

November 3

SPONTANEOUS WILLINGNESS

At my local coffee-mart there is a strip of cellophane tape adhered to the mid of a Plexiglas panel built into the barrier where the line forms.  Only at a certain angle can this satin finish tape be seen.  When I first caught a glimpse of it I recognized others had stood there and responded to the sight of this strip by prying bits of the edge with fingernails; I was drawn to do the same.  I could not pull much up, but each time I stand there I work diligently for the moments it takes to make it to the head of the line and be on my way.  Unseen others pull fragments while I’m away.  Over time we will accomplish this task, unbidden, unknown to each other except through this common goal, spontaneous willingness to do what can be done.

Build a boat in your mind and push off.

*

MISS DIRECTED

I called and rambled at my sponsor.

After a significant time had passed,

she stopped me and asked with a tone in her voice,

“and why are you calling me?”

Startled, I replied, “for your advice!”

“Are you sure that’s why you called?

Because I can give you my advice,

but I have given advice to you before

and received only a severe case of the ‘Yeah, Buts’ in return.”

I was about to say ‘yeah, but you don’t understand’

when she cleared her throat to quiet me

and continued what she was saying.

“Seems to me you really want more than a sober ear,

you want magic.

You want me to take your crazy, dramatic thinking,

put it in a hat and pull it out formed, as all your dreams,

and then you want credit for making it happen.

But, Kitten, I have news for you,

I’m not Mr. Roark and this is not Fantasy Island.

This is sobriety and you can’t just have your way.”

This is when I realized I was on a dry drunk.

I don’t know what the first signs are,

but I do know when your sponsor asks,

“and you’re calling me, why?” the jig is up.

You are reading selections from Sober on the Way to Sane and More Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault

http://www.amazon.com/Sober-On-The-Way-Sane/dp/1440417342/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1388576888&sr=8-1&keywords=sober+on+the+way+to+sane

http://www.amazon.com/More-Lines-From-My-Life/dp/1448677203/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1388576956&sr=8-1&keywords=More+Lines+From+My+Life

Hawaiian Graffiti

August 9

HAWAIIAN GRAFFITI

White pebbles spell themselves across the black of lava grown cold.  Personal announcements proclaim love, school pride, religious freedom.  The care of placement and consideration of design make the roadside an ongoing mineral memo.  What message would I care to share?  What words would prompt me to bring a pail of crushed marble to the edge of the road?  Is there a truth so urgent I would take time from paradise to spell it out?  A few more miles and I see the words I live by strewn down the thoroughfare, “it works if you work it.”

Joint your possibilities.

*

Pick up Your Hammer and Saw

The task infers the tool, I know this,

yet I resist clearly mapping my insanity.

I look into the well of my despair

then quickly I look away,

I fear informing God what I need

lest the need be filled.

I need to believe that a power will heal me,

but if I am provided with the force of life,

I shrink from the prospect.

This too, must be added to the list

of my emotional woes and mental shortages.

This too, will be healed.

I look at my problems

and then realize, that like the moon,

who pulls the water from dry shore to dry shore,

solutions are installed in heaven and earth

if I know what the problem is.

You are reading selections from Sober on the Way to Sane and More Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault

http://www.amazon.com/Sober-On-The-Way-Sane/dp/1440417342/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1388576888&sr=8-1&keywords=sober+on+the+way+to+sane

http://www.amazon.com/More-Lines-From-My-Life/dp/1448677203/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1388576956&sr=8-1&keywords=More+Lines+From+My+Life

Saltbox House

October 2

Saltbox House

Refusing to make reasonable demands is quite as dysfunctional as making unreasonable demands.  The opposite of an extreme is often twice as crazy and harder to explain. I open my mouth and dry toast is the reply.  Nothing should be said when nothing can be done and to do nothing is harder than one might think.  I fold my hands but my lap rejects them; I quiet my mind but my soul objects.  I must let my heart sing and trust you enough to ask for help.

Check your speed and direction

*

REJECTION

Rejection as a game of endurance,
A boundary enhancing process
A test of survival
Rejection sought or unsought is a challenge.

Sometimes rejection is a flare
Lighting the need for change of tactics or direction.
Though it is hard to view rejection as a beacon
Rather than condemnation.

Rejection is also the counterbalance for acceptance.
Risk is nothing if rejection is not part of the equation
I cannot value yes if you could not say NO.

Rejection is the safety valve
For putting myself in situations where I don’t belong.
I get sent back to the world of possibilities when the kindness of rejection

Ejects me from wrong choice.

You are reading selections from More Sober on the Way to Sane and Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault

http://www.amazon.com/More-Sober-The-Way-Sane/dp/144141231X/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1374072329&sr=8-3&keywords=sober+on+the+way+to+sane

http://www.amazon.com/Lines-My-Life-Sherrie-Theriault/dp/1448652820/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1374072576&sr=1-1&keywords=Lines+from+my+life%2C+Sherrie+theriault